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TORONTO MET'S FUNNY PAPER
THE LATEST
Study finds new Matcha Dubai Chocolate Moonbeam Ice Cream Carabiner Labubu Crumbl cookie may pose health risks
Crumbl has announced a new menu item that is promised to “melt in your jizz hole.”
Dylan Marks
3 days ago
Four people you know who are at the Coldplay concert right now
Everyone who's anyone is going.
Edward Lander
5 days ago
TMU Bold partnership with Project Blue Lock leaves some students worried
Critics claim the Blue Lock Program turns “very nice young men” into “self-centred brats”
Tristan Forde
Apr 27
BREAKING: Frankie the Falcon dead after flying too close to the sun
Frankie died attempting to break the world record for "highest altitude achieved via winged flight by a sentient man-thing
Vihaan Bhatnagar
Apr 9
We want you... to join our masthead!
The semester is coming to a close and we're gearing up to hold our first ever masthead election
Abnormal School Masthead
Mar 25
Ontarians give toxic boyfriend just one more chance
It’s going to be different this time around. He promised.
Calan Pittis
Feb 27
URGENT: 90s alum remembers where they left their pre-rolls in pitman
A ‘99 alum needs help finding some Cannabis products left in Pitman Hall
Gavin Sibley
Feb 24
Cargo ship runs aground after mistaking new SCC digital display for lighthouse
A 200,000 tonne Hapag-Lloyd cargo ship has run aground after mistaking the Student Campus Centre’s (SCC) newly-installed digital display...
Edward Lander
Feb 11
A letter from president Lachemi
An important letter from TMU president and vice-chancellor Mohamed Lachemi
Vihaan Bhatnagar
Feb 7
Pope awards Abnormal School citation for services to Catholicism
Pope Francis has bestowed upon the Abnormal School the honour of a citation in the Vatican Apostolic Archives. This is the first time an...
Ella Miller
Jan 24
Executive orders halted due to Presidential paper jam
Newly inaugurated U.S. President Donald Trump’s record number of first day executive orders has resulted in a paper jam. According to an...
Abnormal School Masthead
Jan 20
TMU School of Medicine receives $10 million donation from Dr. Evil McFatCat
“Dr. McFatCat is a valued member of the TMU community and his continued philanthropy is greatly appreciated"
Edward Lander
Jan 15
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